The concept of being “consciously upbeat” certainly sounds like a positive way to embrace the day. It involves taking stock of what has happened, is happening, or is likely to happen–and trying to make the most of it. It’s a deliberate choice, an intentional way of thinking and acting. And, although at first blush it seems to be a relatively easy notion, it can be difficult to put into practice!
This is true for parents, AND for kids.
The reality is that there’s an ever-changing and wide range of potentially impactful contextual factors that have a bearing on people’s lives. For example, there are ravaging storms, devastating global conflicts, personal trauma, economic concerns, and political turmoil. And although some days may dawn brightly and seem fine—or even quite lovely—others are much harder. Draining, complicated, confusing, frightening, saddening, or frustrating… In fact, sometimes what lies ahead looks insurmountable; or a situation feels overwhelming, heartbreaking, or unfixable; or a path is almost impossible to navigate. It’s okay to be sad, disappointed, or worried; to grieve, vent, or express emotions in various healthy ways. That’s part of being human, and can contribute to healing processes and, eventually, to a more positive outlook.
Don’t give up!
CULTIVATING A CONSTRUCTIVE VISION AND VIBE
Be aware of, and appreciate your capacities, and the possibilities for leading a fulsome life.
People’s experiences and circumstances are uniquely theirs, so there’s no one positive framework or action plan that will work for everyone striving to be consciously upbeat. Silver linings may be elusive, and struggling to be happy when you’re not feeling it can be counter-intuitive and daunting.
However, here are two useful strategies to consider:
- GALVANIZE RESILIENCE
“Resilience and persistence are not learned by managing easy tasks… Resilience builds, and does not just materialize during times of adversity or hopelessness.” (Being Smart about Gifted Learning, p. 27, and p. 269)
Life is a balancing act, with many and ups and downs. People have different needs at different times. It helps to assess, monitor, and address your physical and emotional needs on an ongoing basis. Remember that there are healthcare and other professionals who can suggest coping mechanisms and ways to bolster resilience. Learning and growth happen one step at a time, but patience and perseverance will buoy the momentum. Consider how you might use your imagination to engage in creative problem-solving. Try incorporating music, art, prayer, photos, physical activity, altruism, journaling, gratitude—and whatever else sustains you —into your personal tactics for building resilience.
- BE REFLECTIVE
“Take the time to think about your actions, attitudes, words, and feelings—and the potential consequences (such as outcomes, implications and impact)… (Excerpt from Reflective Habits of Mind—And Kids)
Being reflective can help you get to know yourself better. Reflecting facilitates information processing, fuels problem-solving, and assists with decision-making, adapting to change, building upon strengths, and meeting challenges. All good! Ponder possible resources, past experiences, knowledge, fond memories, and creative opportunities. How might they aid you in becoming happier and more fulfilled going forward? What do you hope for? What preparation is needed to head in that direction? There’s great value in thinking things through.
Think creatively, constructively, broadly, and astutely. It will help put things in perspective. Ponder, question, wonder. Why not find others, and share ideas, encourage one another, and brainstorm together? Seize the power of collaborative thought and action.
LAST WORDS
“Every day may not be good but there’s something good in every day." (Alice Morse Earle, historian and author)
Resilience and reflection are important aspects to keep in mind when striving to be consciously upbeat. So, too, is resourcefulness. (Check out the reference below.) And, never underestimate the forces of optimism, familial support, and determination. When circumstances are tough, dig deep to find inner strength. Try to visualize positive outcomes and pleasant times ahead, and seek the comfort, support, and creative outlets you may need to find silver linings—and to prevail.
AUTHOR’S NOTE: It’s been a difficult year. However, rollercoaster interludes are inevitably part of life. We ride the rails and, hopefully, come out stronger as a result. Being consciously upbeat is, for me, a remedy for treating realities that can be upsetting or difficult. Perhaps this approach will help others, too. I hope so…
A HELPFUL RESOURCE:
Drs. Scott Barry Kaufman and Jordyn H. Feingold wrote Choose Growth, a practical book (and “toolkit”) wherein they offer plentiful exercises and suggestions to empower people to overcome challenging times. Whether those challenges pertain to dealing with a loss, adapting to fear or adversity, or trying to anticipate what might lie ahead, they provide supportive measures and means of fortifying oneself. Strategies include anchoring oneself, making meaningful connections, developing healthy self-esteem, exploring, loving, harnessing strengths, living with purpose, and finding transcendence (and embracing gratitude).
The book is geared for adults, but they, in turn can model these strategies for kids, and discuss the merits, too. A key take-away is to pay close attention to surroundings, and to feelings, thoughts, behaviors, and interactions. They all matter!
